its a selfish love. i wear all of you around my neck in blue glass beads and allow your murmurs to drive away my silence. in all my moments of emptiness i assign each of you a role and lo! what results is the most intriguing drama, complete with passion, love, ties, sorrow and tragedy. before my sleep our conversations come alive in a new irridiscence and my world is transformed. maybe that is why i am disppointed each time we meet. my reality cant live up to my imagination. and then all of you complain that perhaps i'm asking for too much. that i shouldn't try too hard. but its too late. i guess i'm already addicted. and i'm very grateful. thank you for helping me escape my mundane existence.